CS Soapbox: Where Does the MonsterVerse Go After Godzilla vs Kong?
Godzilla vs. Kong recently unveiled its first trailer to announce its March 31 release. To be honest, the footage looked pretty cool with plenty of versing going on between its titular titans, including an impressive fight scene atop an aircraft carrier that really demonstrated just how bonkers this movie will be.
However, it’s fair to ponder where Warner Bros. and Legendary’s MonsterVerse goes next, especially now that its two token players have already come to blows. How the hell do you top a matchup like Godzilla vs. Kong? Here’s some ideas we came up with!
Godzilla vs. Pacific Rim
This is the easiest idea, mainly because there’s a lot of talk about this movie actually happening. Guillermo Del Toro revealed on Twitter that he was open to the idea of bringing his Jaegers vs. Kaiju mashup into the MonsterVerse where we could get a battle royale featuring Godzilla vs. Jaegers vs. Kaijus, but then backed up his tweet with the dreaded: “NO plans to return.”
A Godzilla-themed Pacific Rim does sound pretty awesome, though, how you make the concept interesting after three movies of Godz battling monsters remains a mystery even Detective Shindo may not be able to solve.
Godzilla vs. Power Rangers
Look, we’re just throwing this out there. Power Rangers is, after all, very much in Godzilla’s wheelhouse even if the fire-breathing lizard towers over the Rangers’ Megazord by a ridiculous margin. But, hey, if King Kong can grow from 100 feet to nearly 400 feet to duke it out with the King of the Monsters, then Godzilla can shrink to a reasonable enough size to take on Megazord, who stands roughly 333 feet tall, according to the Google.
The only issue here is: Godzilla would have to play the villain role, something the newer films have been reluctant to do until Godzilla vs. Kong. And even then, let’s face it, we all know Godzilla isn’t really bad, right? He’s actually being manipulated by Charlize Theron, who is holding the big guy’s son, Minilla, hostage. Sounds like a job for Jason Statham!
Speaking of which …
Godzilla vs. The Fast & Furious
Why not try a Fast & Furious/Godzilla crossover? Judging by that last Fate of the Furious trailer (released decades ago), in which Vin Diesel swings a car between two cliffs Tarzan style, it’s clear the franchise is running on fumes. What better way to get the adrenaline really going than by having Dom take on Godzilla mano e mano?
The only foreseeable hiccup with this scenario, aside from a substantial size differential, is that both Diesel and Godzilla have it in their contracts that they cannot be in any way upstaged by each other. No prob. After fighting to a stalemate — during which Dom brandishes a giant wrench and thwarts all of Godzilla’s atomic breath attacks with a car door — Dom and his gang of street racers will team up with Godzilla to take down a rival gang Hell bent on destroying the planet with their own monster creation — except theirs is built to look like a giant monster truck.
At film’s end, Godzilla will be given a large bottle of Corona and welcomed into Dom’s family with open arms. Niagra Falls, Frank. Niagra Falls.
Godzilla vs. Transformers
While we kinda sorta eagerly wait for the next Transformers film, here’s a pitch: Godzilla lands on Earth and teams up with Megatron to find some sorta doohickey (preferably linked to a historical event that will be chosen at random) that can transform our planet into Cybertron. Mark Wahlberg must team up with a super-hot scientist to uncover the real reason the robots (and Godzilla) continue to come to Earth. A lot of stuff happens, Shia LeBeouf and Megan Fox return — because, at this point, why not? — and a huge battle happens before Optimus comes in and puts a swift end to the chaos with some sort of new weapon/robot he acquired.
What does Godzilla have to do with any of this? Not a f*****g thing. But it would give Wahlberg and LeBeouf a chance to scream Godzilla-laced obscenities for three hours!
Godzilla vs. Terminator
The Terminator franchise needs a shot in the arm. Why not bring Arnold back in a time-travel adventure that sees the famed cyborg re-team with John Connor (or Dani Ramos, depending on your preference) in order to journey back in time to stop an impending Godzilla-nuclear war by killing the fire-breathing lizard when he’s just an egg? Naturally, the future sends a lone protector to defend Godzilla, in this case Mothra … or something. At some point, in some way, Terminator comes face to face with Godzilla and says [insert clever Terminator line] before tossing his hydrogen fuel cell into the monster’s gut. Hasta la vista, lagartija!
Godzilla vs. the 50 Foot Woman
Ok, this one might be a little outlandish, but how amazing would it be to see Godzilla take on a 50-foot woman? We’re talking Allison Hayes, B-movie style monster bash here. The Attack of the 50 Foot Woman arrived in theaters just four years after the original Godzilla, so it makes sense the two properties should meet up at some point, right? In fact, the plot could revolve around Godzilla looking for a mate and setting his eyes on the 50 Foot Woman, who would rather be an independent gal — it’ll be a battle of the sexes royal rumble, dammit! And if we really wanted to get weird, we could throw in some Alien: Resurrection-style woman-on-lizard love scenes, thus creating a Godzilla-human hybrid for the inevitable sequel.
What if the MonsterVerse follows the SnyderVerse? In Godzilla vs. Kong, the two are initially at odds with one another — Godzilla is angry because he’s been fighting monsters for so long and then this Kong bastard shows up and upends everything he believes in — but then eventually become friends and team up to take down Mechagodzilla! At one point, Godzilla is about to be wiped out but then Mothra swoops in at the last second … we get the holy trinity — Godzilla, Kong, Mothra — together in one shot … a battle ensues … Kong dies and out of guilt Godzilla vows to form a Monster League with the other monsters of the world to take on an ensuing threat — Ultraman! Yeah, it kinda follows Snyder’s films, albeit loosely, but that actually sounds amazing …
Or, they could just bring out Godzilla’s entire rogues gallery, namely Gigan, Anguirus, Battra, Biollante, Destroyah and maybe even King Ghidorah — because why the hell not? — and just make the same movie over and over and over and over and over and over again. Because, let’s face it, most of us will watch whatever they give us.